When I first made this blog in 2019, I had thought of writing something every weekend. Back then when it started, I used to have so much eagerness to write that it would be difficult to wait till weekend. But I used to hold back my horses and post articles each weekend. They used to be on any random observation, such as my conversation with my mother -in-law and what I understood of a person born and brought up in a village. Sometimes I would write about the increased academic load of students and the irony of a woman labourer carrying heavy load of bricks throughout the day only to be seen from outside our hostel balcony. I then started writing about my book experiences, my views on social issues, travel experiences, etc. And just like this my blog kept growing with each passing weekend. The readers were less, but I made it a point to write. If not for the readers, but later to see my own growth and command over my thoughts and the language.
However this year my record of writing has become noticeably smaller. I do write drafts, but do not share them frequently. From weekend, my post have now been monthly. As I was thinking about this, I sheepishly blamed my schedule for this. But my schedule is not so hectic that I cannot write anymore. For five days I am involved in discussion with young and dynamic students, their thoughts and views are enough observation for me to write some or the other thing. I everyday travel for 40 minutes and see a number of mundane and new things. From the adamant cows spread over the highway to the carcass of an animal who was fast but not fast enough than the car it was hit by. I also watch a number of movies and shows on which I can comment and write my thoughts. Overall I, like everyone, am surrounded with stories. Yet like most people, I no longer read a lot and unfortunately have not even been writing a lot.
And now that I have set it straight that my job, my travels, my family, nothing is to be blamed for this lack of interest, I think I can see the elephant in the room. Since past many months I have been wasting my self-time on mobile. The screentime data shows me the mirror. I have been obsessed with a mobile game which is so childish that I cannot dare to write its name here. But with this I realise, how difficult are these times for young students. With high speed internet on our fingertips, it takes a lot to first of all admit that you are falling in its trap, and further to come out of it. The lost moments and time on internet surfing, makes you loose so much more. Even things that you consistently were passionate about. I know of almost no body anymore who reads books for leisure, no one who writes for fun. While Instagram is full of the new rage word called as “Travel diary” with absolutely zero hint of novelty in the poses and the captions, the real diaries too lie in the corners only to be dusted once in a while. Sadly I too have been ignorant of my reading and writing, and all this while I have no one to point fingure at but myself,
स्वप्न झरे फूल से,
गोपालदास नीरज
मीत चुभे शूल से,
लुट गये सिंगार सभी बाग़ के बबूल से,
और हम खड़ेखड़े बहार देखते रहे।
कारवाँ गुज़र गया, गुबार देखते रहे!
Aali Pant 